Letter Writing – do you encourage your kids to write to you?

Dear mom, 

I hope you feel better today 

I love you 

Do you encourage your kids to write their feelings? I find that it is a good way not only for younger kids to practice their pencil grip, but to express and share with you what they are feeling.

I can’t remember exactly now how it all started, but my son started writing us ‘letters’ from since he can grip a pencil. First it was just scribbles and chicken scratches; then he added his name to his drawings in mirror image. It progressed to “I love you’s”; then on to the now two to three liners. Our home is riddled with his letters written on the back of scrap papers, post it notes, homemade cards, etc.  There is currently a sticky note by the light switch in his dad’s study which says –

Dear Dad,

I love you.

Don’t forget to switch off the light

At times when I was cross with him he would wrote me a note and placed it on my bed which says –

Dear mom,

I am sorry I made you upset today.

I love you.

I find that it was a wonderful way of acknowledging not only his feelings but mine too, and know that his actions had affected me and that he openly acknowledged it. I, in turn, would scribbled something below his note.

Down the hallway, on the pin board, my son wrote on scrap paper which he had initially folded and given to his dad as a secret message  –

I love this family. 

Dad pass this on the mom after reading this.

There are many other life skills developed out of this practice. But, I thought and I hope, that  by encouraging this act of letter writing, my son when he grows into that stage in his life where emotions are more complex and stress levels are starting to build, that he would be able to sit and write down his emotions and thoughts and either share them with me or anyone he desires to or just merely as an expression of relief. 

I once said to my son, “you know, if you don’t feel like talking to me, you can write me a note”. And write he did.

I wonder, do you practice the same in your household?  ♥

Happy St. Patrick’s Day !

http://www.lifeisgood.com

May God grant you always – 
A sunbeam to warm you,
A moonbeam to charm you,
A sheltering Angel,so nothing can harm you.

 – Irish proverb

Thank you everyone for your Likes on my posts and your show of support. Here’s a little Irish luck for you and your family. Happy weekend – ♣

Twelve Things Great Parents Do

12 Things Great Parents Do (HuffPost Parents)

I haven’t made up my mind yet whether to accept the title of being a “great parent”, because I know I am not. I am full of flaws and at best use my instinct and my common sense to help me navigate through the intricate web of parenting. But, just like most of us parents, I do my very best to nurture my child, and let him be the best he ever wants to be; for when I have done that, then I have achieved my purpose in life.

So, this article from the HuffPost grabbed my attention naturally. After all, even though I do not want the title of being a great parent, like you I aspire to be the best I could ever be as far as my son is concerned (but never in comparison with anyone).

Here then is a checklist of how parents handle their role to beget them the honor of being great parents (taken from The Blog : HuffPost Parents) :

 

7 Worst Mistakes Parents Make When Talking to Children

7 Worst Mistakes Parents Make When Talking to Children  (Babble.com)

I hate to nag. That is one of the first things I promised myself I won’t do when I become a parent. And yet, sometimes, I think I nag. I couldn’t quite definitely say that I do, but the constantly having to remind my child about things he needs to do or haven’t done, makes me guilty of being a nagger (though I don’t really think so).

Anyway, according to Babble here are 7 mistakes parents commit when talking to their children. No.1 on the list is nagging –

1. Nagging
2. “Because I said so…”
3. Talking down
4. Not focusing on the discussion at hand
5. Talking too much
6. Using guilt
7. Using threats

Read on ♥

You Can Be The Parent Your Child Always Wanted

You Can Be the Parent Your Child Always Wanted  (Aha! Parenting)

“Childhood feels long, but it’s short. Every day, your child is creating memories. He’s shaping his brain. He’s laying the foundation for relationships for the rest of his life.

Resolving to be more patient doesn’t necessarily make you a better parent, if you don’t give yourself the support to stay calm and regulate your own emotions.

What one thing could you do today to support yourself to be the parent you want to be? Just do it.”

Somehow, I needed this reminder. Read on ♥

6 strategies to “unspoil” a child

6 Strategies to “Unspoil” a Child (Dr Michelle Borba)

“Blinded by love”, some would say.  And I say-  it’s not what we give our children, it’s how we raise them.

Parents do not outright-ly and intentionally spoil their children. However, something goes wrong along the way during our course of parenting t that makes it difficult to unravel the tangled web of “giving in” too much.

“The average kid nags a parent nine times. The average parent gives in at the ninth nag. Don’t let a spoiled kid win.”

Dare to take the 4-word test to spot a spoiled kid?

Read 0n ♥

Helicopter Parenting : do you hover over your kids?

Not to long ago, I was asked to be a guest writer for The Awakened Parent blog and the topic was about hovering parents. Below is the full article I wrote –

Helicopter Parenting. It is when we as parents ‘hover’ over our children, no matter what age, constantly checking on how they are doing; a habit we as parents develop from when they were born. And mothers are more guilty, I think that the dads.

As parents we fuss about our children from birth until forever at least for some. It is this nurturing instinct that we parents find difficult to shed. But is it good or bad? It depends, in my opinion.

Helping to Understand Asperger’s Syndrome

Meeting Matthew (Teaching Tolerance)

While on a queue at a grocery store, I notice the boy standing two spaces down after me standing very close to this girl in front of him. The girl younger than the boy was becoming upset as she thought she was being pushed forward by this boy who is now talking loud behind us. As I do not want either parents to feel that I was snooping around, I decided to face forward and ignore them. Then, I heard the boy’s mother telling him to stand to the other side of her; the mother also said to the girl’s mother she is sorry her child has Asperger’s.

From what I have read about the case, some people who are afflicted by the condition can be very clever, and that some symptoms are like that of autism.  As I know very little about the condition I made it a point to look it up when I arrived home. I them chanced upon this article Meeting Matthew which I am sharing with you in the hope that we will be a little more enlightened about the condition, its symptoms and how to help deal with the condition. WebMD also has listed some of the symptoms of the case.

Read on ♥

Lifehack!

I chanced upon this quote on Lifehack.org, and it goes –

“If you cannot explain it to a six year old, then you don’t understand it yourself.” 

♥  ♥  ♥

Home Schooling : Have you ever considered?

Ten Good Reasons for Homeschooling  (HomeEducator.com)

Have you ever considered homeschooling?

I have, when my son was still a toddler. I fiddled around the idea partly because being new to a foreign country I knew nothing much about the schools around where we live except by what I read and by what other people tell me about those schools. The problem with seeking other people’s opinion about how good a certain school is, is that, it is in their opinion. I know of families in the States who have successfully home schooled and so it opened my mind to that possibility.

And so, why did I not?